A woman decides to have a facelift for her birthday. She spends $5,000.00 and feels pretty good about the results. On her way home she stops at a newsstand to buy a paper. Before leaving she asks the sales clerk,
- "I hope you don't mind my asking, but how old do you think I am?"
- "About 32 " the clerk replies.
- "I'm actually 47," the woman says happily.

A little while later she goes into McDonald's and asks the counter girl the same question. She replies,
- "I'd guess about 29."
The woman replies,
- "Nope, I'm 47."
Now she's feeling really good about herself.

While waiting for the bus home, she asks an old man the same question. He replies,
- "I'm 78 and my eyesight is going. Although, when I was young there was a sure way to tell how old a woman was, but it requires you to let me put my hands down your panties. Then I can tell exactly how old you are."

They waited in silence on the empty street until curiosity got the best of the woman and she finally says,
- "What the hell, go ahead."

The old man slips both hands down her panties and begins to feel around. After a couple of minutes she says,
- "Okay, Okay, how old am I?"

He removes his hands and says,
- "You're 47." Stunned, the woman says, "That's amazing. How do you know?".

The old man replies,
- "I was behind you in McDonald's."